If you are fat, broke and have a terrible voice, you too could be on TV

Did you read this week about those sad women addicted to being on TV? It seems they will do anything - swap partners, proposition strangers for sex, even undergo intimate surgery just for the thrill of being on TV and subsequently recognised in the street. Do you remember a time when people became famous for, well, for having talent? Now you merely have to know someone with a dubious talent (yes, Abby Titmuss I'm thinking of you here) to get onto the reality TV show circuit. Soon everyone will have forgotten that you can't actually do anything clever, funny or entertaining. As for those TV-addicted women, how weird. They are willing to put their real lives in jeopardy for the sake of having complete strangers come up to them at parties and say: "Wasn't that your spleen I saw being removed on 'Gory Operations' the other night?" I've just had a look on their favourite website - http://www.beonscreen.co.uk/ - and it seems that the reality TV wannabes in big demand at the moment are obese people, bad karaoke singers, people in debt and couples who've lost the "spark" in their marriage. Chances are that "spark" will be a long-forgotten memory if you're married to a fat, broke person with a terrible voice who is also a reality TV junkie. The whole thing is madness. Why crave recognition in this way? It's like standing in a public place and shouting "look at me!" It's like writing your innermost thoughts and pinning them up on the town hall noticeboard! It's like.......oh.