Bring back the breakfast-on-a-plate option

Whoever came up with the idea of breakfast buffets?

Let's look at the facts:

1. Whether it's fried eggs, sliced meats, waffles, croissants - we all have a definite idea about what breakfast involves and how it should be served
2. None of us are at our best in the mornings

So what do hotels do? They abandon the wonderful practice of gently seating you at a table and bringing you tea before serving you - silently -with the breakfast of your choice. Instead they lay on an assault course of multi-coloured fruit juices, viciously spitting hot drink dispensers and huge covered dishes with clattery lids to confuse and bewilder the poor, blinky-eyed guest. Then they'll throw in a few special challenges such as the do-it-yourself toaster that ressembles an old-fashioned mangle, or the Scandinavian teacup-with-no-handle.

If you're on your own in a hotel, you'll of course have the added problem of finding a table and leaving your breakfast there before wandering off to find a cup of tea, only to discover that the Breakfast Police have helpfully removed your dish in readiness for the next guest.

I'm becoming increasingly tempted to "slum it" these days and opt for the traditional B&B where there are just two options: tea and toast or Full English. I'll then meekly accept whatever this entails whether it is simply eggs, sausages, bacon and tomatoes or all of the above plus mushrooms, fried potatoes - and if you're lucky, the downmarket but fantastic addition of baked beans.

One of the things we DON'T need in the mornings is choice. Just bring it on - quietly - and we'll love you forever. Or at least until lunchtime.