You think that’s funny? You must be crackers

Have you ever thought about our strange custom of pulling crackers at Christmas? How we have to read out those terrible jokes, sneer at the toys and then wear those stupid hats?
It’s all the fault of some bloke called Tom Smith, a baker in Victorian London, apparently.
A bit of an entrepreneur, he began selling his own version of Parisian bonbons after a visit to France when he was impressed by those tasty almond sweets that came in a twist of paper.
When he realised his biggest bonbon customers were young lovers who bought them for their sweethearts, he began to incorporate love mottos. Then he became even more adventurous. Inspired by the crackle of his own log fire, he began looking at ways of recreating that exciting “ snap” sound.
Several accidents and nasty burns later he perfected his salt petre “snap” and incorporated these into his sweets as well. As competitors flooded the market with rival products he was forced to differentiate with small toys and hats. The rest, as they say, is history.
His legacy is a bunch of bemused, slightly sozzled British people who all sit around the table with their ridiculous hats worn askew as they groan at jokes. Thanks, Tom – we owe you one.

Some typical cracker jokes

Why did the turkey cross the road?
Because he wasn't chicken

What is brown and sticky?
A brown stick

What does Santa do with fat elves?
He sends them to an Elf Farm

Why is it difficult to keep a secret at the North Pole?
Because your teeth chatter

If a buttercup is yellow, what colour is a hiccup?
Burple

How does Santa like his pizza?
Deep pan, crisp and even

What always succeeds?
A budgie with no teeth

How does Bob Marley like his doughnuts?
Wi' Jammin

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall?
Dam